The Great Viking War of Season 3

Toonies

Toonies

Inactive
Inactive Player
Location
Denmark
Brace yourselves, memes are coming....

Most of you have bore witness to the cheeky banter and overall ridiculousness between @BShank and I so far this season. It's likely you've rolled your eyes, sighed, and silently wished that we would shut up. If you have, you're wrong, and I will destroy you. Just kidding, I love you.

The consensus? There is room for only one Viking Warlord on this server. Because of that, a war of great proportions has begun!

For example, The Vatnsmelóna Clan (or The Melon Vikings, if you're not a pretentious fool) struck the first blow by filling the base of The Warriors of Odin with watermelons.

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Absolutely barbaric, I know.

Because the leader of the Melon Vikings has too much time on her hands, she made it her mission to retrieve the banner she'd left with her first prank, as the leader of The Warriors of Odin was using it to rally his warriors. And we thought that was scary, so we took it back.

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I mean, they've got melons on spikes over here. That's upsetting, ok?

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And so The Stolen Banner was reclaimed. But then we used it again in the next prank, so the enemy has it again.

Upper management is still figuring things out, alright? Jeez.

Because the clan leader of WoO (Betcha didn't think that acronym through, did ya buddy?) were slow to retaliate, Vatnsmelóna struck again. They brutally defaced the chicken shop at spawn, which is the property of WoO.
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A brutal prank? Or an act of Charity? Chickens have soft heads, we just wanted him to be protected. And look how cute he looked. Fabulous.

Uninterested in fighting a one-sided war, The Melon Vikings sat back and spent some time looking at their pretty boat while they waited for WoO to retaliate.

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Seriously, look at it. It's beautiful.
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Several days later, The Melon's awoke to a gruesome sight. It was so gruesome it was deemed too brutal to show. (Certainly had nothing to do with either party not taking a photo. Neither clan would ever be so forgetful. No no.) Their protection talisman had been defaced by an unknown building. There were graves on the ground as well, but as we said, too brutal for the internet. No one needs to see that.

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So what was this? A guillotine of sorts that when activated, brutally crushed a sacred melon.

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Alright jeez. That escalated quickly.

A few melons in your kitchen and on your chicken's head and suddenly we all have to die. Alright, well, it's on like Donkey Kong! (Vikings say this, it's historically accurate, look it up.)

Now, listen up. The sheer brutality of the war will be great (Obviously) and you'll need to choose sides. Yes, maybe The Warriors of Odin have the monopoly on Mending books, and every other kind of enchantment in the known universe. Maybe he's rich, and handsome, and he can keep you fed with all his chicken. Maybe The Melon Queen only has a few pieces of fish, and her biggest seller is frozen water, but she has a pretty boat.

Seriously, scroll up and look at it again.

It's a nice boat. Doesn't get much nicer than that. Look at it. So pretty.

So, residents of North West, you have no choice. You belong to me now. Your care packages will be dropped off within the week. You will fly our banner, or we will smack you with our fish, melt our ice in your bases, and fill them with melons. (The care packages will have nice things in them please don't leave ok.)

Everyone else, the time will come for you to decide...

Are you with the rich guy, or the lady with the pretty boat?
 
I laughed until I cried. WoO!! :D hahahahahaha he really didnt think that one thru. And I see it was sabotage, as it was the Melon Vikings wife who suggested it! bwahahahaaaa!!!
 
"The Guardians of the North" stand by their Melon Queen!!

He may have the looks, the diamonds, the books and the steady supply of mead and chicken.
But you, my Queen, have the sacred, all powerful and mighty BOAT.
We will stand with you, our queen with the nice melons, through this war!​
 
LOL, after reading this and when i was done laughing i decided that i am going to root for Shank and The Warriors of Odin, just because the name Melon Vikings sounds soooo, well girly and The Warriors of Odin that is a real man's name, i have no choice than to root for the man....

You go Shank, give them hell (or something)
 
Greetings peasants!

Due to the gruesome melon activities that are taking place all over the server, The Warriors of Odin, hereafter referred to as the WoO, the mighty WoO, the glorious WoO, the fierce WoO, or just as the WoO that got rid of the heinous Melon people and their sneaky Melon Queen, see no other way to solve this conflict that has risen between the two tribes than to prepare for war! (phew.. long sentence, lemme catch my breath)

I have sent one of my most trusted men, Stein Bjørn, on a scout ship to this place you may call Spawn! His direct orders are to recruit the best and the bravest on this server, to stand with me in my just war against the Melon Queen. He does not speak much, but he has written a book where he explains everything!

Swear your loyalty to me, and your life will be spared! Not saying we gonna kill you if you dont, but we might, probably will, unless we like you, or you provide goods that we can use in the war, or its not convenient. People really underestimate the mess, which surprises me.

Look for the scout ship and Stein Bjørn in his little dirt hut. He is quite cold, so if anybody could light his little bonfire he would really appreciate it.

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